Over 40 Dating for Women - How to Know if He is Serious


There may be several reasons why single women are looking to date after the age of forty. For some it could be re-experiencing the carefree days of youth while for others it could be seeking like-minded company after having greater leisure and resources. An overwhelming majority of women though throng the dating scene in search of a partner who is willing to settle down to a committed relationship. But then how do you identify such a guy from the merry go-round of dating partners. Here are some signs that will tell a woman if the guy she has been seeing for some time is serious about her.

He makes an effort to share interests with you

While it is much more common for a young couple to pull along by the sheer force of sexual attraction, after forty it becomes more important to get involved in mutually enjoyable things. Sharing the same hobbies and interests is a powerful factor in romantic compatibility since this lets a couple enjoy each other’s company in a fun and non-emotional kind of way. This is not to imply that post forty men and women can no longer enjoy the thrill of sexual chemistry, but that a serious relationship after midlife will involve much more permanent and lasting factors.

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He is there when you need him

One of the surest signs that a guy is serious about you is that he is there when you need him and not just to change the tires of your car but in a deeper and more emotional way – for instance to listen to you when you have to let out steam about a conniving coworker or to stay the night when you are unwell. Man or woman, every individual needs some kind of emotional bonding with a close partner – it is after all what makes us human. But if you find that you cannot get a word of support from your guy on a rough day or some sign of empathy when you are upset, it is certain that you have no use for him unless as someone to spend the night with.

He makes you feel good about yourself

When dating after the age of forty, women are often besieged with doubts about their looks and ability to appear attractive. If your guy is serious about you, he will make you feel good about yourself. Love is all about being happy and positive. Even though sometimes it makes for tears and anxieties, but such emotions are only momentary. If your man is truly in love with you, then in this relationship you will never feel shame, lack of self-worth, fear and distress about how you look, behave and who you are. You will love being the person you are and will no longer find it necessary to hide the little quirks and habits which you feel are embarrassing to reveal to strangers.  Also when your partner is around, you will feel that no matter how bleak the external situation you can pull through together.

He invites you to meet his family

Men usually discuss their families only with those who are close enough to be let into their inner lives. When dating over forty, it is quite likely for a guy to have kids from a previous marriage and he may be all the more careful as to who he introduces his kids to. So if your guy invites you to spend a Sunday afternoon with his kids or asks you to accompany him to his niece’s wedding where his family will be present, it is a sure sign that he may be seriously thinking about making you part of his life. On the other hand, if your boyfriend has never suggested that you meet his parents and even appears to be uncomfortable talking about them to you, then perhaps he is not ready take your relationship to a higher level as yet.

He talks about the future

And this very likely includes you. When talking about his future, does your guy merely discuss his goals of starting a business someday and does he share a dream about buying a beach house especially when you know he is aware of your love for the sea. If your boyfriend is reluctant to share his future plans with you or if they don’t involve you at all, then it is unlikely that he wants this to be a long term relationship. On the other hand if he talks about his dreams and goals with you and more importantly if he asks you about yours, it could be a definite sign that he is serious about a relationship with you. This is especially true in case of couples over forty since by this time they have devoted a considerable part of their lives towards career advancement and are now looking to enjoy life with someone they love.

He wants it to work out

Every relationship has its share of disagreements and arguments. If you have been dating for some time now, perhaps you know how easy it is to walk out when things don’t fall in place. But if a guy is serious about you, no matter what the circumstances he will want to make this work. He will not only wish to clear the misunderstandings that threaten to pull you apart but actually want to fine tune your relationship so that you understand each other better. And in all his efforts, there are no ego trips, no desire to score a point or prove that he is right. This is especially relevant when dating after forty since by this time individuals are rather set in their ways – both you and your boyfriend are perhaps used to living life the way you want to and thus any new adjustments are difficult to make. However a man who is serious about the relationship will take steps to fix things with you, no matter how long or how much effort it takes.